Dear mom
by MsWeepingWillow
Summary: Alex writes a letter to his mother. A/I
1. Chapter 1

_Dear mom, _

_I don't really know where to start.. I know you haven't heard from me in over 7 years and I am sorry. You're probably mad at me and I don't have a good excuse, except for the fact that a lot of stuff happened. I'm still in Seattle and my internship is over, I am now a resident. I still love my job and I've never regretted the choice to go to medical school because saving lives for a living is amazing and it keeps amazing me every single day. It was hard in the beginning, long hours, little sleep.. but it's better now. You know how I used to tell you how I wanted to become a plastic surgeon? Well, plastic surgeons are asses (sorry) and I used to be an ass, but I'm not anymore. I've changed. I'm thinking about specializing in PEDS. I think that's what I'm supposed to do, cause I'm actually good with kids. Who would have thought, right? _

_You're probably thinking, why now? Why is he writing me now? Well.. that's a long story. I'm a little afraid to tell because I know you'll be disappointed that I didn't tell you earlier. I met a girl, she did her internship in Seattle too. I thought I'd been in love before, but I had never felt like this. She is amazing, I know you'll love her. It took a little while before we really got together, but I had never been more happy when we did. Mom, you have no idea how much I love this girl.. Everything was going so well us but it wasn't meant to be because she got sick. She was diagnosed with stage 4 skin cancer which had spread to her liver and brain in February of 2009. She had a five percent chance of survival. My world was crushed but she's such a strong person, she fought hard. A lot of tumors were successfully removed and we thought, well, maybe she's the exception. Until they found another inoperable tumor in her brain. The day we discovered she'd be dead in a few weeks, maybe months, I married her on May 7__th__, 2009. Yes, I got married. It was the best and saddest day of my life. I married the girl I love, the most beautiful girl in the world. With or without cancer, with or without hair. I turned into a man that day, a man with responsibilities, a husband. I wish you could have been there, I wish you could have witnessed my girl, Izzie Stevens, become your daughter-in-law. But we thought she was going to die so it was on short notice. I don't know how we got so blessed but our friend, Derek Shepherd, a neurosurgeon, had figured out a way to remove her inoperable tumor. There was a risk of memory loss but we took our chances, and luckily we did. Because she survived and she had not lost her memory. There was a moment after the surgery where we almost lost her. I have never been more afraid.. but again, she pulled through. All we could do now was trust the chemotherapy and IL-2 treatments would work to kill the rest of the cancer. And it did. It worked. It took a year for her to beat the cancer and a lot more has happened. Her best friend died, she got fired from the hospital, she left me, she came back, she left again. I know it sounds awfull and not reasonable for her to leave, and it wasn't. But it's such a long story. I'll tell you once. It just comes down on the fact that she was exhausted. She needed time alone to grieve the death of her best friend, her discharge from the hospital, her sickness.. But she came back again, for me, because I was there every step of the way. I was there for every chemotherapy, for every surgery.. She came back because she realized she couldn't live without me either. I didn't understand at first but I couldn't stay mad at her forever. She was healthy again and she became herself again and I just fell in love with her all over again. She got her job back because we had another chief at that time and we saved money and we moved to a beautiful apartment in Seattle. And the reason I'm writing you now, is because my wife, my Izzie, changed me for the better. And right now, I'm staring at your granddaughter. Your beautiful granddaughter, Ella Louise, we named her after you, Louise, born on the 10__th__ of November 2011. Izzie made me realize how important a mother is to a child, and it made me realize how much you love me, because the love for your child is unconditional. I know that now, and I love you. I want you to meet Izzie and Ella as soon as possible and I hope you are proud of me. I just know that I miss you and I want you back in my life, in my families life so that you can see how happy I am. _

_Love, Alex_


	2. Chapter 2

_Dear son, _

_I must say I am shocked. I had not expected to hear from you anytime soon. I am more shocked though, by the fact that you became a husband and a father. It hurts me that I have not been a part of that but I am willing to forgive you for not contacting me for so long. I am not saying everything is solved, but I don't want to be the person who ruins your happiness now. I'm glad you found someone, and I figured she must be really amazing because I know it's hard to stay together during stress and difficult times. She sounds like an exceptional girl, surviving cancer is not for everyone. Loving my son is also not for everyone. I would love to get to know the mother of my grandchild. You did good, Alex. I am proud. I am really proud. I am proud that you are everything but your own father. I know you didn't have a happy youth, even though you would always deny that just to make me feel better. But I knew how you felt, you are my son. How could I not know? _

_I also knew from the beginning you would not become a plastic surgeon. That was just an attitude. Deep down inside, you were always good with kids. I have always been scared that there wouldn't be a person who could see through it. Who could see who you really are. _

_I will be saving some money to come down to see you and meet your girls. In the meantime I would love to keep writing letters. Can you maybe send me some pictures of your wife and your daughter? I am awfully curious. _

_Iowa is still the same, it's quiet without you and your brother. I've been keeping myself a little busy by helping out at the local bakery and Uncle Samual comes by every now and then. He'll be surprised and happy to hear that you're doing well. _

_Take care sweetheart,_

_Your mom. _


End file.
